Wednesday, June 25, 2014

Battlestar Galactica 1.9: “The Gun on Ice Planet Zero, Part 2”


Airdate: 10/29/78

The worst face masks EVER
The Artic-bound Galactica crew is led back to the colony where their recent acquaintances, a ragtag gang of humans enslaved by the Cylons, live. Things aren’t a whole lot of fun there; it turns out they’ve been procreating behind their chrome-clad masters’ backs, but the head dude, the “Master Creator,” does seem to have peace-seeking intentions in mind, even if he is refusing to acknowledge that his death beam is being used by the Cylons as an instrument of war. The Galactica approaches the range where she can be blown to bits by the beam, so Starbuck and co. must find the beam’s installment and destroy it, or else we’ve got a real short series on our hands.

The silliness continues, but at least we get to look at Brit Ekland, even if she is wearing a Dutch-boy painter’s outfit - the official garb for this oppressed tribe of humans she’s a part of. The quasi-mad “Master Creator” is somewhat interesting in his self-imposed obliviousness and the warped rationale he uses to justify his inventions – he kinda reminded me of a heavy in a cheapo sci-fi flick from the 60s. But just about all of this is the same old tedium. So a few observations.

1.     We’re getting the same stock footage over and over again everytime the Galactica launches a Viper fighter. It’s true – I was paying attention. The fact that I was just shows how bored I was by the plot.
2.     The enslaved humans at first refuse to help Starbuck and the others destroy the beam – they believe it would render them defenseless. Stabuck rejoins with the logic that it would spare the Galactica, the only human colony battleship in existence, which could then rescue them. But in the end, they still refuse (unless I missed something). Thanks a lot, guys.
3.     And the Cylons keep firing the beam over and over again, at – nothing! They’re trying to prove how close it can get to the Galactica, and we see explosions, but never what, exactly, is getting destroyed.

Rating:  *1/2


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