Cheers 7.10: “Bar Wars II: The Woodman Strikes Back”

Airdate: 1/12/89

Time for Boston’s annual Best Bloody Mary Contest, and time again for Gary’s Old Towne Tavern to take the prize, but not if Cheers can help it. Sam arranges for a secret ingredient to arrive, but Woody accidentally sneezes away the laboriously procured black cardamom, and breaks a secretly smuggled jar of Gary’s recipe as well. When Woody tries to go undercover as a nun at Gary’s, he’s tied up and suspended outside the bar door; worse yet, he quits when everyone at Cheers calls him stupid for his efforts, and takes a job at the competitor’s. Gary suspects foul play at first, but gradually trusts him. Perhaps he shouldn’t – Woody was a spy all along, and delayed giving a message to his boss that the contest was moved up two hours. Frantic, Gary and his minions race to Cheers and get their Bloody in last minute, but the contest turns out to be a fake – the real judge has yet to arrive. When he does, Gary comes back, again, winning and crowing that he can’t be fooled. Carla is seen handing some cash to the judge – another fake-out – the “judge” is an old neighbor; the real judge is a female arriving in 30 minutes. Gary returns, and the Cheers crew think the jig is really up, but he just wants his wallet back.

Another Bar Wars, another guessing game of Who’s Zooming Whom, with Cheers having the last – the very last – laugh. Title is a bit of a spoiler, as we’re not sure what Woody’s up to with his quitting, but I suppose we all had an inkling of suspicion. Gary is a great villain, and his secret videotaping and broadcasting of the Cheers crew praising his cocktails is an ace move.

Cold open: Carla coaxes Lilith into revealing Frasier’s secret oedipal foreplay requests; she then proceeds to share them with the boys in the back. Ooooh, that Carla!

Norm’s opener: Woody: “Hey Mr. P., there’s a cold one waiting for you.” Norm: “I know, and if she calls, I’m not here.”