Wonder Woman 2.10: Mind Stealers From Outer Space Part One

Airdate: 12/2/77

Andros returns, and this time he’s got bigger fish to fry – or should I say, skrill to fry. That’s the name of a deadly, invasive alien species that have arrived on earth to steal human, a valuable black-market commodity in the rest of the galaxy. Once again, Andros is at odds with the rest of his council, who give him a time limit of 6 days to TCB. Lucklily, he enlists the help of Steve and Wonder Woman; the three of them track down a couple of college students used as Skrill host bodies, and discover that the pernicious intruders are able to store minds in small egg-type devices, which is where the feale student’s mind is being kept. Part One closes with a real threat – the Skrill plant “catnip” in Diana’s apartment to lure Sardor, a big badass alien ogre, to kill her, and thus Wonder Woman, whom they figured out are the same person..

Not what you think.

More crazy interstellar hijinks revisits Andros (from the “Judgment from OuterSpace two-parter), who is now played by a much younger and better looking Dack Rambo. Again he is distrusted by his colleagues and has to go it alone. (Why don’t they listen to this guy – wasn’t he right last time?) The Star Wars influence is clearly evident here, given the show’s two-part format, increased budget for special effects, and the all-too-obvious modeling of the masked, dark-caped, Sardor after Darth Vader. There’s also a bit of the then-just released Close Encounters in here too, especially in the first half when the distrustful authorities cordon off a whole tract of acreage to “investigate” the aliens.

But all told, a good intro to what promises to be a crazy showdown. Given the superhero nature and campy tone of the show, it’s good to see WW face off against some threatening villains for a change.

Cheers 3.21: “The Executive’s Executioner”

Airdate: 3/7/85

Norm is caught in the toilet stall by his boss, Mr. Hecht, who offers/threatens him with a promotion, but not an entirely lucrative one: to be the company ax-man, responsible for firing those who do not fit in with the company’s new “organizational changes.” Chosen because he is seen by inferior to everyone at the firm, and thus not enviable in any way, Norm executes his job as executioner with so much pity he becomes a basket case himself, reduced to a blubbering mess with each pink slip he delivers. When he starts to become emotionally numb, however, he knows it’s time to quit, only everyone at the firm hangs up on him for fear that they are next on the chopping block!

Sort of a 25-year precursor to Up In the Air, this entry gleans just as much comic mileage from the concept, but at about 90 fewer minutes. Highlight: a dreamlike filmed sequence of Norm’s nightmare, in which he gleefully pushes accountants down an elevator shaft, until he realizes his next victim is himself. The Cheers filmed sequences are fun (remember Diane at the funny farm), but a verbal description of the dream would probably have done just as well.

Subplot is funny too: Cliff’s noisy neighbors push him to the limit, so acid-tongued Carla helps him draft a vitriolic letter to the guilty party. When he resolves the matter himself,  the letter is just about to go out, so Cliff, in a very un-Cliff-like manner, seizes the post from a letter carrier and intercepts its mailing. Whew!

Cold open: Carla berates a departing customer for his cheap tip of 25 cents; when the intimated man offers a ten and asks for change, she throws the quarter back at him, telling him to beat it.

Norm’s opener: Sam: “What will you have, Normie?” Norm: “I’m in a gambling mood, Sam. I’ll take a glass of whatever comes out of that tap.” Sam: “Oh, looks like beer, Norm.” Norm: “Call me Mr. Lucky!”

Waltons 8.24: “A Decade of The Waltons” Retrospective Special

Airdate: 5/22/80

Well – 8 years, at least (I think they’re marking the 1971 TVM “The Homecoming” as the beginning). This double-length special aired a couple of months after the 8^th season ended, and is structured by Earl Hamner, in person, narrating to the audience the story, both real life and fiction, of the Waltons, as well as a tailor-written story about the family preparing for Grandma’s birthday celebration.  A mostly seamless marriage of fact and fiction carry us along as we go down memory lane, and see some the highlights from the show’s past 8 years, including the book burning episode (one of my favorites), Olivia’s bout with polio, the big fire, John-Boy’s departure, Grandma’s homecoming after her stroke, Mary Ellen’s marriage and birth of her son, and Zeb’s passing. At the end of this scrapbook we see the actors playing the Walton children talk, via split-screen, to their real-life counterparts, Hamner’s brothers and sisters. This is probably the only clunker – the “questions” are all-too obviously scripted, and the answers, recited by non-actors, are even worse. Wise of old Earl to end with his monologue from the end of last season (see 7.22).

One thing Earl mentions that I appreciate is the way he and the crew attempted to make The Waltons a family show with an ongoing story, not as individual episodes fixated in no particular timeframe. Nowadays when practically all dramatic television is serialized, it’s not such an anomaly, but in 1972 it was.

I had figured this episode was filmed sometime in the first half of last season, as there is no Cindy, but Jim-Bob makes reference to getting into the Army Air Force, so this must have been shot in sequence and they arranged to get Learned back as Olivia.

The final dinner table scene is interesting, featuring the family at the dinner table saying good night to each other using real names.

For what it’s worth: the original Lorimar logo is played at the end of this show.

Wonder Woman 2.9: The Man Who Made Volcanoes

Airdate: 11/18/77

Professor Chapman, a former government physicist, has “changed his mind” and gone mad, plotting to destroy the world by activating dormant volcanoes across the globe until world peace is achieved. Diana trek to Mexico where his base is located, along with representatives from the other volcano-stricken countries, China and the USSR, all of whom think the US is behind it all. It’s up to WW to act as diplomat, negotiator and human laser shield, all rolled into one, to stop this nefarious plot from being realized.

Strange, often-silly outing succeeds neither as high camp or literate, reasonably credible drama (the two poles of possibility, it seems, with this show). Roddy

McDowell is Chapman, whose bespectacled, over magnified eyes are the best part of his performance, which commits the unpardonable sin of dullness. The Chinese and Soviet agents are extra characters that don’t really have a reason to be here except, I suppose, to promote the allegorical message that humans will always fight each other, even in the name of peace. Whatever.

High point here is the new opening- no longer animated but now live-action, coming after a cold open, juxtaposing action highlights together with superimposed titles. Biggest letdown: the theme song is mostly instrumental (save for the chorus of “Wonder Woman”). Oh well, all things shall pass.

Oh, let’s not forget the walls closing in scene, where WW must do a quick change and bash in the bricks to escape. Reminiscent of the sludge-wall in the Cathy Lee Crosby TV movie, and likely inspired by the trash compactor scene from the then-huge Star Wars. (Ahem, that’s just Star Wars not Episode IV).

Cheers 3.20: “If Ever I Would Leave You”

Airdate: 2/28/85

A ragged Nick Tortelli comes to Cheers a wretched mess. His wife, Loretta, left him to join “The Grinning Americans,” a wholesome, travelling singing group, and now he’s broke, homeless… and willing to give Carla another chance. No way, Jose, is her pat response, but Nick (and the entire Cheers bar) keeps asking, no—begging, for her reconsideration. Carla tests his devotion by imitating Loretta asking him to come back; he passes, but when the real Loretta does the same thing in person, Nick, after realizing this is not another Carla test, runs after her, blaming it on some strange, involuntary behavior,

More airtime for the Tortellis expands their characters a bit, and gives Carla more room to play as well. Good closer as Diane revealing she, too, has a weakness for “inferior” men, and is almost caught identifying the beau in question, changing “Sam” to “Samurai Frasier.”

Cold open: Frasier picks up for The Sorrow and the Pity, part of the “Human Brutality Film Festival,” and Sam explains where Coach is to Cliff and Norm, which turns out to be so involved a story he admits the man may return before it’s even finished.

Norm’s opener: Norm’s already at the bar.